My Cheap Ploy to Get Lots of Comments -- I Say What's on My Mind

I haven't had a post that engendered a lot of comments recently so I'm resorting to a cheap trick: telling just what I think. I figure one or two of my opinions will raise some hackles. Should you find anything I say here objectionable, please, please leave a comment.

I believe that puppies should be boiled alive, especially the cute ones.

All breakfast cereal should be heavily laced with hallucinogens.

School playgrounds should be veritable minefields. This way only the very lucky will survive into high school.

Death panels are a great idea but should not just be for the elderly. Everyone should have to go before one and panelists should be heroin addicts in the throes of withdrawals.

Henceforth all adults must perform their own colonoscopies.

Free speech is highly overrated. Limit it to every other Tuesday, say between noon and three pm.

Jean-Claude Van Damme is our greatest living actor.

That Glenn Beck fella seems like a sane, reasonable, rational human being.

Answering the question, "what's up" by saying "the sky" should be punishable by death.

All snowflakes are identical.

South Carolina shouldn't be the only state that alllows the brain dead to enter politics.

The single most important thing a person can do for society is to maintain a film blog.

Hopscotch is the greatest sport in the world (the photo above is from last year's national championships in Hazelton, Pennsylvania.)

Fridays and Wednesdays should be forever switched. If I have to explain the rational for this you're beyond hope.

Boys most definitely do not have cooties.

I think the whole story about Abe Lincoln beating a street mime to death is probably true.

(That ought to do it. Post a comment and you will be sent $5,000 in gold coins or my name isn't Vlxczy P. WF7uioennie.)

Note: Normal film blogging will resume with my next post.