The WNBA

I was watching a WNBA game on Sunday and I noticed that most of the players are ugly. There wasn’t any WNBA player that I saw and said, “She looks fine. I would go out with her.” There was none. There wasn’t even one WNBA player that I wanted to get pregnant. These WNBA players look like the NBA players. They have braids and tattoos. They look exactly like the male athletes. I saw one WNBA player that looked like Shaquille O’neal. I said to myself, “Is that Shaq? Since when did Shaq play in the WNBA.” I don’t know how these WNBA players find dates. If one of the WNBA players asked me out to dinner, I wouldn’t show up. I’d rather go on a date with an Orangutan.
These WNBA players are too tall. They’re hands are the size of my head. I can’t imagine myself holding hands down the street with one of them. It would be like holding hands down the street with my big brother. I don’t know how shorter guys deal with these women. I don’t know how they kiss these gigantic beasts. I would have to stand on a ladder to kiss one of them. And if you’re a short guy you can’t get into a fight with a WNBA player. They’ll put beat you up or put you in a headlock. Or even dunk over you.