Screech sex tape

The sex tape industry has now reached a new low. That new low is the Screech sex video. When I first heard that there’s a sex video involving Screech, I forgot who Screech was. I thought Screech was that nerd on Family Matters. But then I realized that Screech was that other nerd on Saved by the Bell, which is even worse. I was shocked, not by the tape, but by the mere fact that a girl decided to have sex with Screech. Other than Screech, who the hell is going to watch this video. Not me! I don’t want to watch any video with Screech in it. I’d rather watch new episodes of Pokemon. Who would have ever thought that Screech from Saved by the Bell would come out with a sex tape. I always thought it would be Kelly or Mr. Belding. I was wrong. I wonder what Zack thinks about this. He was probably the one filming it. This is bad publicity for Screech. This is worser than the time he ruined Lisa’s fashion show. If Screech can make a sex video, anybody can make a sex video. Soon there might be a lesbian sex video featuring the Golden Girls.
Why did Screech have to sell a sex tape to make money? Why couldn’t he just sell an old lamp on Ebay like everyone else. I would have bought that old lamp. If this Screech sex tape sells more than the tickle me Elmo doll, this country has problems. Serious problems.