Three Bogies, Woody, Warren, Lawrence and the Brothers Marx -- The Films That Saw Me Through the Flu This Past Week

It is a tradition at Riku Writes that once a year I get floored by the flu. It's never enough to send me into delirium but powerful enough to make reading a chore and working an impossibility. The bright side is that I get to spend some quality time on the sofa with some beloved friends -- movies.

Here's a capsule looks at some of those that sustained me these past seven days. Bringing intellectual nourishment to accompany the Tylenol, hot tea and tissues.

Duck Soup (1933). How is it possible that you can not only know the lines that are coming but say them along with the characters and still bust the proverbial gut with guffaws? I dunno either but it happens whenever I watch this, my favorite Marx Brothers film. Surely the delivery of the quips has much to do with it. All hail Freedonia and its fearless and witty leader Rufus T. Firefly as played by the comic genius, Groucho Marx. More than any of their other films this is his picture. Chico and Harpo are in strong supporting roles and Zeppo shows up for the last time. Margaret Dumont is indispensable as Mrs. Teasdale. Nearly 80 years later what passes for comedy in movies today is Adam Sandler getting hit in the crotch. Talk about not making em like they used to.... As Firefly said:  "I got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it."

Lawrence of Arabia (1962). I love/hate this movie. Perhaps that's stretching it. I really like/dislike this movie. Oh never mind. Point is my thoughts are decidedly mixed (you guessed?). On the one hand, every time I watch it I want to run out and by every book available by and about T.E. Lawrence. Peter O'Toole gives one of cinema's great performances as the iconoclastic Lawrence. "I'm different," he says of himself by way of explanation early in the film. And how! Wonderfully so. Surrounded by stiff upper lips by-the-book British military, he marched to the beat of his own drummer. Sometimes through the desert. But with each viewing I become increasingly bothered by a film of well over three hours with nary a word from a female, or even a gander at one for that matter. Worse is Alec Guiness as an Arab. Worse still is how everyone speaks English. I know, I know, the film was made at a different time. Slavery was at a different time too and I still hate it. It's epic, sweeping, masterful and a creaky old anachronism.

Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948). Oh Fred Dobbs, when will you ever learn? You could have had wealth and happiness. But plenty was not enough. Greed cost you your sanity then your life. Humphrey Bogart was at this very best as Dobbs in this remarkable John Huston film. So was Huston's dad, Walter who copped a well-earned Best Supporting Oscar (not even a nomination for Bogie? now that's insane!) The younger Huston also was rewarded for his direction and screenplay. TOTSM is a film that works on so many levels which means it never gets tiresome. Hell, when does great film making ever tire one?

The Big Sleep (1946). I once wrote on this here blog that I didn't think I could not respect the opinion of anyone who didn't at least like this movie. I'm going to have stand by that. Yes it's Bogie and Bacall. Yes there's a byzantine plot. Yes it's a classic whodunit with many people having been dun. Sure there's a lot of other classy and sexy dames besides Bacall to brighten the scenery. But its the dialogue that does it for me. Five examples:

1.Vivian: You go too far, Marlowe. 

Marlowe: Those are harsh words to throw at a man, especially when he's walking out of your bedroom. 

2.General Sternwood: How do you like your brandy, sir? 

Philip Marlowe: In a glass. 

3.Philip Marlowe: She tried to sit in my lap while I was standing up. 

4.Vivian: I don't like your manners. 

Marlowe: And I'm not crazy about yours. I didn't ask to see you. I don't mind if you don't like my manners, I don't like them myself. They are pretty bad. I grieve over them on long winter evenings. I don't mind your ritzing me drinking your lunch out of a bottle. But don't waste your time trying to cross-examine me. 

5.Philip Marlowe: My, my, my! Such a lot of guns around town and so few brains! You know, you're the second guy I've met today that seems to think a gat in the hand means the world by the tail. 

Play it Again, Sam (1972). Not to be confusing, but this is not a Woody Allen though he wrote it and stars in it. Also this is still another Bogie film though not really since he's not it though someone plays him. To clarify: it's not a "Woody" in that he did not direct it (Herbert Ross did) which to a lot of people is a hard and fast rule about constituting Woodys, so to speak. And Bogie is a character in the film played by an actor (Jerry Lacy). Play it Again, Sam is just as funny today as it was nearly 40 years ago. It was Allen when he was writing thoughtfully funny comedies and playing the lead to hilarious perfection. It's his first film pairing with Diane Keaton and they are magic together. Tony Robert's as Keaton's husband is rock solid here as he was often for Allen movies. The setting is San Francisco. Allen is a recently divorced cinephile so obsessed with Humphrey Bogart that Bogie's apparition visits and counsels him. It's a great comedy and a veritable ode to Bogie in general and Casablanca (1942) in particular.

The Parallax View (1974) This film is like a great story being told by someone who mumbles. Warren Beatty is a reporter who investigates a political assassination from three years before as witnesses to the killing keep dyeing, including a friend of his. He is led to the mysterious Parallax Corporation which, as it turns out, seems to be responsible for the killings at the behest of God-knows-who. It's all fascinating and for a generation brought up as its inspirational leaders were getting bumped off in most peculiar ways, it is an important topic to explore. There's a lot of plausibility to the story and at worst it gives viewers a lot to chew on. The Parallax View is the very quintessence of the paranoid political thriller of 1970's cinema (a topic I once explored on this here blog). But there are a few scenes that stick out like very sore thumbs. Such as an over the top bar fight that adds nothing to the story and the implausible coincidence that leads to Beatty unfoiling a plot to explode an airplane in flight. The story is also told in a hazy, jumpy way that speaks poorly of either director Alan Pakula or his editor or both. Still I re-visit The Parallax View every few years and am always glad I did.

Dark Passage (1947) It should now be quite obvious that I see real healing powers in watching the films of Humphrey Bogart. This is also another Bogie and Bacall production and I'm going to get extremely controversial here and state that she was never lovelier than in The Dark Passage. Bogie gives a solid if somewhat understated performance. After all we don't really seem him until an hour into the picture. Oh he's in it from the get go all right but he starts off with a different face before plastic surgery gives him the mug we all know and love. Thus the first third of the movie we see not him but what he sees. It could be annoying but it's not. Thank you director Delmar Daves. Later his face is wrapped in bandages. Course we don't much miss him what with Bacall to set our peepers on. Agnes Moorehead is part of the show too and brudder what a stinker! Yeah, she gets hers. San Francisco is the setting again. Bogie plays an escaped con holing up with Bacall hoping to clear his name. There's the requisite suspense and romance but this is a happy film noir at heart. Great cinematography highlights the film. Speaking of Daves, he also wrote the screenplay. His other credits include a musical, Dames (1934), a war picture, Destination Tokyo (1943) and a sappy love story, Love Affair (1939). That's versatility!

Plenty of Pencils, Plenty of Books, Plenty of Teachers' Dirty Looks, in Movies No Less; Some of the Best Films Set in Schools

"Those who can teach
Those who can't become administrators."

According to my calendar it's October which means among other things that there's foliage aplenty and students across the country are settled into the new school year. The classroom is an ideal setting for a film and it's only surprising there haven't been more really good movies set in schools.

Perhaps one reason is that too many such attempts are well meaning but ultimately unrealistic portrayals of teachers as miracle workers who by dint of an impassioned speech can turn a failing student into Einstein. School movies also tend to create stock characters of teachers and especially students playing too much into stereotypes and not trying to say anything real about their lives and struggles. There are exceptions, some of which are in the list below. There are also films that satirize or parodize (I made that word up).

I know a little bit about the subject having spent over 20 years teaching, not to mention 13 years in public schools and umpteen years in various universities accumulating all manner of degrees, certificates and credentials (which are collectively worth something approximating the cost of the paper they were printed on). Anyway I thus claim to have some authority in discussing school films, both as a movie devotee and a long team denizen of classrooms in various roles.

(Long time readers of this blog -- both of us -- may recall last year's list of my ten favorite cinematic teachers.)

The list below is of films that show school days, either middle school, high school or college. They all have students, teachers, classroom scenes and all are damn good movies.

Sentimental Education (Not the Flaubert Novel) in Good Bye Mr. Chips (1939) Sentiment works if there's some substance to the story and there's just enough in Robert Donat's performance as the title character. This is a look back at an entire career. Many people teach for decades and enjoy, not every minute of it, but most of them. There is no better way to learn than to teach. There is no better way to get acquainted with people as a species and individuals than to teach. While this film is too quick to try to make us reach for our hanky, it does show the scope of a career and how meaningful such a life can be.

Realistic Education French Style in The Class (2008) In terms of capturing the experience of being a teacher today this is the best school film ever made. There is very little difference between this French classroom and some I've labored in here in the US. Same type of daily struggles to deal with recalcitrant or down right mean spirited young people. Mind you, most students are well meaning young people who truly want to learn. However, being too young to know better, they often act out in inappropriate ways (not always without some reason) and serve as their own worst enemies. The teacher's challenge is to channel their energy into positive directions while variously ignoring or dealing with bad behavior. In addition to individual personalities, classes form types as well. A teacher must negotiate a whole class, individual students and still teach the subject in as meaningful and engaging a manner as possible. Suffice to say its complicated and its a bloody wonder that all of us in education don't go completely mad every day. But there are rewards too. It is tremendously satisfying to see young people grow and learn and to fancy oneself as part of the process. If you're not sure what I'm about, just see this picture. It tells the story far better than I can.

Party School Education in Animal House (1978) Yes, I'm quite serious about including this semi farcical look at college life circa 1963. There's nothing farcical about its depiction of college students partying like there's no tomorrow (I know from personal experience -- a lot of it). In addition to being one of the funniest movies ever made, Animal House captures the rapturous abandon that can accompany college life. The booze, the parties and best of all the s-e-x. Yes college is first and foremost about one's studies, but neglecting to study life itself and all its wild possibilities is to miss out on one of higher education's most important benefits. And when there is engagement against the stuffy, moneyed classes, all the better. John Belushi led a hilarious cast but not to be overlooked is Donald Sutherland as the pot smoking prof. Nothing like a totally cool teacher.

Teacher Shenanigans in Election (1999) Teachers are not perfect, teachers have personal lives, teachers are not finely tuned machines dispensing  data and rendering perfectly objective judgments. No matter how much administrators want them to be. Then again rigging a school election is a no no. Matthew Broderick is the all too human teacher. His nemesis is the ridiculously chirpy Tracy Flick played by Reese Witherspoon in what was a star making vehicle for her. It's a movie that throws the kitchen sink of high school life at us. Sex, including homosexuality, popularity, drugs, friendship and oh yeah, homework.

Old School of Hard Knocks in The Blackboard Jungle (1955) Sure its dated but only just and anyway there is realism in its look at the harsh realities of teaching and learning in a troubled inner city school. Glenn Ford is perfectly believable as the idealistic young teacher. His biggest problem is student discipline and boy don't that sound familiar to those of with experience in the biz. Discipline problems are the number one reason so many young teachers quit teaching before their careers get started. Who can blame them?

Smart Lads in a British School in The History Boys (2006) Believe it or not, not everyone in school is a spitball throwing little snot. In fact there are entire classes full of nothing but terribly bright, precocious young men and women who want to learn. Witness this film, a wonderfully told drama of such a circumstance. Watch intelligent students and teachers discuss weighty issues, unafraid of intellectual challenges even those that can lead to journeys of self discovery. In an ideal learning situation students don't compartmentalize knowledge but see learning as an organic experience. History Boys is a celebration of intellectual curiosity and that is a very, very rare thing in a film about a school.

Marxist Education in Horsefeathers (1932) Any list that includes a Marx Brothers film is a good list. Of course Horsefeathers qualifies here because it is set in a college, Huxley, whose rivals are Darwin, the fictional college not the real person. (Many years ago a friend and I who revere this movie had hats made with Huxley on them.)  The movie opens with Groucho's appointment as president of the college. To show you how little has changed these past 80 years, he proposes tearing down the university and building a bigger football stadium. In addition to a skewed and hilarious look at a college classroom, see a skewed and hilarious look at a college football game. All courtesy of the brothers Marx.

Hey My Teacher is a Drug Addict in Half Nelson (2006) The story of an excellent teacher who oh-by-the-way happens to be a druggie. This is an indy film starring Ryan Gosling in what was an Oscar nominated performance. Like Broderick's character in Election, Dan Dunne is no saint. Few saints would snort illegal substances during school lunch time. He is, however a dedicated teacher, coach and mentor who has a positive impact on his students in an inner city middle school. There are teachers like Mr. Dunne who inspire and enlighten beyond the call of duty. And there are those whose personal lives are not rated G. So while Half Nelson is merely a glimpse of a school, a teacher and some students, it is a very real and thus important one.

I'm Going Out for the School Football Team in The Freshman (1925). Who better than Harold Lloyd to capture the excitement of going off to college for one's freshmen year? Okay that wasn't a totally serious question but then this isn't a totally serious movie. It is a classic though and one that does in fact capture a lot of the naive enthusiasm experienced by a naif leaving home for the first time properly equipped with out sized and unrealistic dreams. So many go off to college with grand plans of conquering the campus and instantly becoming the big man on it with all attendant privileges. What a shock to find oneself the proverbial small fish in a spacious pond. Of course this is a Lloyd comedy so realism is otherwise not the order of the day. Great fun is including some classic grid iron action. Yowzah!

What No Ginsberg? In Dead Poet's Society (1989) Any movie that promotes unconventional teaching is okay in my book. Also, any movie that promotes the appreciation of poetry is aces too. Robin Williams is the teacher and of course he runs afoul of those brain dead types who operate too many schools. Peter Weir directed this story of carpe diem and walking to the beat of your own drummer. Williams may hold the record for appearances in terrible films, but this one is just fine and his performance as John Keating is one reason why it succeeds. There is nothing more thrilling for a teacher to light a fire under students by introducing them to new ideas, new concepts and new ways of looking at the world. You get a look at that miracle here.

(This post is dedicated to J Rage and Old Man Williams of Willard Middle School. There are no better teachers walking the face of the Earth.)

Movies and Trains, As Natural as the Cream in Your Coffee

Trains and movies go together as naturally as jazz and saxophones. Directors are afforded a contained area which is at once limiting and liberating. Passageways are narrow and quarters confined and there's no terra firma. On the other hand there's movement, scenery, and challenges for the camera that can create memorable cinema. It's remarkable how many chase scenes successfully take place on trains, along with fist fights, love scenes and silly shenanigans.

Spacecraft, ships, aeroplanes and even submarines have provided moving set locations for films, but not with the degree either of frequency or success as have trains. Train travel was much more common in the United States up until the 1960's. Except for the Northeastern Seaboard, trains in the U.S. are infrequent, expensive and stop everywhere, making such travel tedious and impractical. It's a sad loss for Americans who as such strong individualists all want their own modes of transportation (i.e. cars) and can't abide their tax dollars subsiding a seemingly archaic mode of travel.

So aside from visiting or re-locating to Europe your best bet to enjoy riding the rails is to watch a movie.  There are literally oodles ("did he just write 'literally oodles'"?) of movies, most from the first half of the previous century, that feature lengthy or important scenes on choo choos. I can not even pretend that what I provide below is anything more than a sample. This list could easily be twice, three times, even four times longer. But I do think I've got a representative sample of excellent films where trains were integral to a good story.

The 39 Steps (1939) or Escape on a Train. Alfred Hitchcock frequently used trains and invariably to great effect. In The 39 Steps a man (Robert Donat) wrongly suspected of murder must elude the coppers while on board a moving a train. This first creates drama when a newspaper with his mug on it is purchased and then when the law gets wind he's on the train. A woman is of no help but a bridge is, in this delightful film full of derring do, dash and whimsy.

The Lady Vanishes (1938) or International Intrigue on a Train. Another Hitchcock film. This time there's a charming little old lady on a train and then there's not. Where'd she go and why does no one believe our heroine (Margaret Lockwood) who insists the woman was on board? It won't surprise you to know that there are the proverbial bad guys in this film, most of which is set on a train.  There's also eccentric English gents, romance, a handsome leading man (Michael Redgrave) and a shootout. Great fun in one one of Hitch's most under appreciated efforts.

The Train (1964) or World War II on a Train. In this film from director John Frankenheimer, trains co star with Burt Lancaster in a thriller about the French resistance trying to save rare works of arts from the clutches of the Nazis. The villains are trying to get the artwork out of Paris via -- take a guess ... who said train? Lancaster leaps about trestles, tracks and the trains themselves in his effort to thwart the bad guys. Action aplenty much of it on moving trains. Great stuff for WWII, train and film aficionados. (If you're all three you're in for a real treat.)

Twentieth Century (1934) or Theater on a Train. John Barrymore and Carole Lombard hamming it up and us viewers cracking up. This is great stuff. The film starts in a theater where Barrymore is an impresario and Lombard his discovery. But much of the action takes place aboard a train called the Twentieth Century, a few years later when Lombard is a big star and Barrymore's fortunes are on the wane. He's trying to woo her back with guile, a wing and prayer. Howard Hawks directed the twosome and let em have it. So you get two thespians feasting on the scenery, which remember, is a train.

Go West (1940) or The Marx Brothers on a Train. By rights this shouldn't be here as it's not a terribly good film, especially for the Marx Brothers. But it features one of the great trains scenes of all time. It is an elaborate chase sequence in which the train is veritably cannibalized to fuel itself. It is the embodiment of madcap antics and its on rails.

Shanghai Express (1932) or Scandal and Civil War on a Train. This folks is a great film and its long past high time it got its much due DVD release. Almost the whole shebang takes place aboard a train, namely the Shanghai Express. Marlene Dietrich stars as the notorious Shanghai Lil a well known, shall we say working woman, who's one of several intriguing passengers aboard the express. The journey will find itself right in the  middle of the Chinese Civil War. Joseph von Sternberg directed.

Wild Boys of the Road (1933) or The Depression on a Train. Riding the rails was a common form of transportation for the colorfully named hoboes of America's Great Depression. In this classic from William Wellman, it's teenagers searching for where the grass is greener. They hop a freight, meet compatriots and even get into a brawl with cops. Hoping a freight epitomized those desperate times when cars were abandoned and people searched the land for some sort of break. This movie captures that time as well as any other.

Palm Beach Story (1942) or The Ale and Quail Club on a Train. Folks, this is train abuse pure and simple. What the wealthy and intoxicated members of the hunting and imbibing club do to this train is a scandal. Their gunplay (harmless in intent) terrorizes a porter and provides unwanted air conditioning to a club car. Meanwhile they go on a hunt for a young lady they've taken under their wing, utilizing their beagles. That young lady (Claudette Colbert) not surprsingly hides from her besotted benefactors and in the process meets a very wealthy bachelor (Rudy Vallee). You get it, it's more madcap fare from director Preston Sturges and is howling good fun.

Schindler's List (1993) or The Holocaust on a Train. I enver said this was going to be all yucks and giggles. There is a tragic iconography in the trains pulling into Auschwitz with their doomed cargo. Stuff to haunt your dreams (its done mine) for its grim reality. Schindler's List evokes that horror and particularly the horribly crowded cattle cars.

Some Like it Hot (1959) or Men in Drag on a Train. What could be better than sharing intimate quarters on a train with Marylin Monroe? Not much although watching her cavort with Jack Lemon and Tony Curtis, with the latter two in drag, comes pretty close. This classic comedy's key middle third takes place aboard a Miami bound train. The three stars were never better.

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969) or Bandits on a Train. Behold the dedicated bank employee who stands steadfast aside his company's safe refusing to yield to the Hole in the Wall Gang. No, he'll not let them near the loot though they threaten to blow it and him to kingdom come. Our persistent thieves are led by Butch (Paul Newman) and Sundance (Robert Redford). Imagine their surprise when too much dynamite is used and money blows hither and yon. And imagine their shock when out of some of the trains cars come armed horseman. The law! The chase is on and birthed by a train.

Strangers on a Train (1951) or A Train With Strangers On It. There's actually not a lot of this film (another from Hitchcock) set aboard a train but what there is is crucial. Strangers opens with the chance meeting of two men who strike up what is to one of them a most interesting conversation (to the other it all seems rather macarbe and odd). Our oddball suggests that they each commit a murder on behalf of the other. Each will have an air tight alibi and thus neither will be suspected. The train and most espeically the tracks provide some key symbolism as well as a starting point.

A Medicine For Melancholia

Today I had a case of the end-of-the-Thanksgiving-Break-three-weeks-until-Christmas-break-blahs. Fortunately I had recently recorded Flying Down to Rio (1933) which was, as you are no doubt aware, the first cinematic pairing of Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers (I was going to toss a whole bunch of glowing adjectives in front of their names but those names in and of themselves suggest all manner of encomiums).

Flying Down to Rio has some rapturous film moments surrounded by a fairly silly story. This was to be par for the course for Fred and Ginger's films. I say that not to slight them in the least, I own a box set of their films that I wouldn't part with for its weight in gold (please don't take me literally if you have gold to offer, I was being hyperbolic in order to make a point).

So I watched Flying and voila, mullygrubs gone. Above I have posted a scene from another Fred and Ginger film, Swing Time (1936). If you're currently feeling down in the dumps (actually wouldn't being "up in the dumps" be as bad as down in them? I mean whether up or down, the dumps are not a happy place to be...but I digress) and do not have access to one of their films (what's wrong with you? No Astaire Rogers in your house. For shame!) try this on for size. There's plenty more at some place called You Tube that you may have heard tell of.

Suffice it to say that I believe it infinitely more difficult to be depressed in this day and age when there is ready access to some of the lightest, most carefree moments ever recorded. I hasten to add that when such moments are supplied by the likes of Fred and Ginger, they are wonderful displays of extremely talented people cutting the rug. So you get awesome talent mixed in with delightful character actors like Eric Blore who shows up in the above clip. You just can't beat em with a stick, not that you'd ever want to.

In Woody Allen's Hannah and Her Sisters (1986), Woody's character botches his own suicide. Disconsolate, he walks the streets of New York for hours, finally entering a movie theater that is showing The Marx Brothers in Duck Soup (1933). Revelation! To see such merriment and fun may not give purpose to life but it does show that humans can be be pretty darn good at entertaining themselves and one another. If one is in fact only to go around once, why not take advantage of all the joy that can be found.

Serious business must be tended to and we've all got responsibilities and duties aplenty. But when burdens and cares start to feel oppressive and the seemingly endless slog seems purposeless, it is indeed nice to know that we can spend some time hanging out with folks like Groucho Marx, Fred Astaire or any of the other zillions of entertainers whose works are forever preserved on websites, Cd's, DVDs and the like.

It took George Bailey a visit from an angel to see that he had a "wonderful life." Sometimes a visit to you tube is all any of us need.

It's Not Just a Great Movie Song, It's Educational!

OMG These Movies Totally Cracks Me Up -- Every Time

There are movies aplenty that will induce hearty laughs the first time you watch them. A second viewing is often disappointing because all the punch lines and surprises are well remembered. However there are those rare comic masterpieces that are funny with each and every viewing.

You can pop the DVD in every year or two and once again find yourself slapping your knees, rolling on the floor and wiping away the tears as your sides split.

I recently read an online discussion on what makes a good comedy funny. Folks, it was dreadfully boring reading. There are some things I just don't feel the need to analyze, like why a strawberry tastes good or why Groucho Marx makes me laugh. So I will spare you any analysis of why the 12 films below continue to tickle my funny bones. They just do. Of course a quick gander at the list will reveal some familiar names like the afore mentioned Groucho and Woody Allen, Bill Murray and Steve Martin. Oddly there are some among you might not find one of these gents particularly amusing. Just as I am left yawning by many supposed funny men that are otherwise popular. Much of what makes us laugh is a matter of personal tastes that often relates to our age and thus our early comic influences. That's as much analysis as I care to indulge in.

Here are a dozen films that are guaranteed to leave me in stitches. When you've finished perusing the list I invite you to offer a film or two that always leave you rolling in the aisles.

The Movie Animal House (1978) The Director John Landis The Stars John Belushi, Tom Hulce, Peter Reigert The Line Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no! The Comment Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

The Movie Stripes (1981) The Director Ivan Reitman The Stars Bill Murray, Harold Ramis, John Candy The Line C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like going into Wisconsin.
The Comment Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho.

The Movie Duck Soup (1933) The Director Leo McCarey The Stars The Marx Brothers The Line Nobody calls a Firefly an upstart! The Comment He he he he he he he he he he he he he he.

The Movie To Be Or Not To Be (1942) The Director Ernest Lubitsch The Stars Jack Benny, Carole Lombard, Robert Stack The Line So they call me Concentration Camp Ehrardt, to they? The Comment Har har har har har har har har har har har har har.

The Movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975) The Directors Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones The Stars Michael Palin, Eric Idle, John Cleese, Terry Jones, Terry Gilliam, Graham Chapman The Line I didn't know we had a king. I thought we were an autonomous collective. The Comment Yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk.

The Movie Some Like it Hot (1959) The Director Billy Wilder The Stars Tony Curtis, Jack Lemon, Marylin Monroe The Line Real diamonds! They must be worth their weight in gold. The Comment Chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle chuckle.

The Movie The Lady Eve (1941) The Director Preston Sturges The Stars Barbara Stanwyck, Henry Fonda The Line Postively the same dame. The Comment Haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw haw.

The Movie Manhattan (1979) The Director Woody Allen The Stars Woody Allen, Diane Keaton, Mariel Hemingway The Line They probably sit around on the floor with wine and cheese, and mispronounce allegorical and didacticism. The Comment Guffaw guffaw guffaw guffaw guffaw guffaw guffaw.

The Movie Arthur (1981) The Director Steve Gordon The Stars Dudley Moore, Liza Minelli John Gielgud The Line Thank you for a memorable afternoon, usually one must go to a bowling alley to meet a woman of your stature. The Comment Chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle chortle.

The Movie Bananas (1971) The Director Woody Allen The Stars Woody Allen, Louise Lasser The Line I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in braille. I used to rub the dirty parts. The Comment Giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle giggle.

The Movie A Night at the Opera (1935) The Director Sam Wood The Stars The Marx Brothers The Line I have here an accident policy that will absolutely protect you no matter what happens. If you lose a leg, we'll help you look for it. The Comment Titter, titter titter titter titter titter titter titter titter titter titter titter titter.

The Movie The Jerk (1979) The Director Carl Reiner The Star Steve Martin The Line I was born a poor black child. The Comment Hardy har har har hardy har har har hardy har har har.

Now remember to submit your own cinematic comedy gold.

Margaret Dumont and Joe Pesci Would Make Such a Cute Couple

First of all take a big sip of water and don't swallow. Ready?

I was watching A Night at the Opera (1935) on TCM Saturday and got to thinking about how similar it is to Goodfellas (1990).

Spit take!

Those of you who haven't already concluded that I'm round the bend may now join the rest of the universe in assuming that all's not well in Riku's gray matter. The Marx Brother and the mob? Rufus T. Firefly and Paul Cicero? Thirties comedy and Nineties gangster?

It's all in the anarchy, folks. Groucho, Chico and Harpo don't play by the rules. Laws, conventions, social norms mean nothing to them. If it felt good, they did it. Especially if it got a laugh. For Henry Hill, Jimmy Conway, Tommy DeVito and the rest of the "gang' in Goodfellas, laws and rules are at most a minor inconvenience. Certainly nothing to get in the way of a few dollars or a good time.

To the brothers Marx and the fellas good, society was something to take advantage of not aspire to. No traipsing carefully around civilized, cultured types, they are squares who don't know from fun. As for cops and dowagers, they were foils. In fact anyone who presumed to authority or respectability was subject to a good smack or a clever jibe.

One of the great appeals of both the Marx Brothers in particular and the gangster genre in general is the vicarious thrill derived from watching people do whatever the hell they want to do -- and for the most part getting away with it. Of course someone walking into a cafe and spitting on the floor would neither be entertaining nor interesting. But pulling of a heist or cracking wise at the expense of a society dame...as the song goes..that's entertainment!

Movies are, after all, an ideal form of escape. There's nothing like living out the fantasy of doing what you want on your own terms be it killing em with laughter or a gat. Harpo bounds around wordlessly creating havoc and chasing women -- literally-- just as we might like to do. Meanwhile Jimmy Conway takes what he wants, when he wants, but always as a gentleman, leaving cash with the hijacked truck drivers. With laughs or panache, its all done outside regulations.

The rest of us our confined by society's conventions. Sure, we may cheat a little here, or take a bit extra there, or ignore section something code something else. But we do it behind close doors and maybe even a little guiltily.

The Marx Brothers and the gangsters of Goodfellas are also honest. They don't pretend to be respectable like we do. There are no false fronts in the way they live their lives, actually live them. How gleefully audiences applaud those who are true to their spirit, living life on their own terms. how jealous we are of them.

Not our cinematic friends. They've the cajones to do in front of god and everyone else.

Imagine.

Jumping Anaconda! The Perfect Cinematic Warmup for your Super Bowl

Yes, perhaps Cardinals versus Steeler will be interesting but it can't compare with the storied Huxley-Darwin contest of 1932. That great college match up was brilliantly retold in the wonderful film, Horesefeathers (1932). The film's stars included four siblings, Groucho, Chico, Harpo and Zeppo Marx.

Has there ever been a more dramatic football sequence than at the climax of this movie? Perhaps. But there's never been a funnier one. Horsefeathers is one of the Marx Brothers funniest films. Second only to Duck Soup (1933) in this writer's most humble opinion.

Groucho is Professor Quincy Adams Wagstaff who we meet at the outset of the film as he is being introduced as Huxley's new president. Zeppo is a long-time Huxley student and Wagstaff's son. (Such a loving relationship. "I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you arrived," father tells son.) Chico is an ice man employed at a speakeasy and Harpo the local dog catcher.

So you have the Marx Brothers running amok in a university, a speakeasy and a football game. Can't go wrong.

Thelma Todd as the "college widow" is the love interest. Thelma was a real dish who led a life worthy of a bio pic. Before making it big in pictures she was a beauty queen and a school teacher. Later she became a successful entrepreneur. Thelma resisted when the mob tried muscling in on her restaurant business. Thus her death at age 30 to carbon monoxide poisoning, ruled a suicide, was highly suspicious.

There is a brief appearance in Horsefeathers by the lovely and too little known Theresa Harris as a maid. Lovers of films from Hollywood's Golden Age will instantly recognize Ms. Harris who appeared in dozens of films in the 30's and 40's, usually as a maid. You can see her in such celebrated films as Morocco (1930), Arrowsmith (1931), Gold Diggers of 1933 (1933), Baby Face (1933), Miracle on 34th Street (1947), Jezebel (1938), The Big Clock (1948) and Mary Stevens M.D (1933). She was a good actress, with excellent comic timing and a fine signing voice. Why the short shrift? She was an African American. One is tempted to say that she was born in the wrong era. But it wasn't her birth date that was too early, it was integration in Hollywood that was too late.

So Todd and Harris are nice bonuses to this laugh riot. From Wagstaff's introductory remarks to faculty and students in the form of a song: "I don't know what they have to say / It makes no difference anyway / Whatever it is, I'm against it. / No matter what it is or who commenced it, I'm against it! / Your proposition may be good / But let's have one thing understood: / Whatever it is, I'm against it. / And even when you've changed it or condensed it, I'm against it!"

Through Wagstaff's taking over a science class and, with the aid of his real life bros, introducing true anarchy.

To pitching woo with Ms. Todd (and see if you can figure out the deal is with the umbrella).

To the climactic football game ("Is there a doctor in the house? "I'm a doctor." Hi ya, doc!") Horsefeathers packs more laughs into a 68 minute running time than most current sit coms manage in a whole season.

And I'd be remiss if I failed to mention the film's lasting impact on my own football viewing. Whenever I want my team to run the ball I recall Chico's own signal calling at the line of scrimmage: "Hi Diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle, this time I think we go up the middle."

Classic comedy.

Gray Skies Are Gonna Clear Up

Got the blues? Feeling low down? Depressed? Lonely?

Don't pick up that drink. Stay away from those drugs. Put down that tub of ice cream. Do what I do. Watch a movie!

One route is to watch a great film. Enjoying art at its best is a sure cure for the miseries. But what if your mood is particularly low? Taxi Driver (1976) or Citizen Kane (1941) aren't exactly pick-me-ups. Perhaps instead of Schindler's List (1993) you should try something a little lighter. Okay, here are some recommendations of films guaranteed to wipe away that dark mood and without a concomitant sacrifice of quality.

Duck Soup (1933). Ignore the film's supposed anti-war message and just enjoy the Marx Brothers at their funniest. Chuckles, guffaws and knee-slappers from start to finish.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986). Ignore the dark side of Alan Ruck's character and enjoy watching Ferris stick it to the man. Hijinks and two rousing songs during a Chicago parade highlight this laughfest. Get ready to grin.

Footloose (1984). Ignore the social themes about repressing youth. Instead just dig the dancing. In fact you may just want to fast forward to the closing scene where the kids dance to the title song. Go Kevin Bacon!

Some Like It Hot (1959). Ignore the grisly gangland murders and join Jack Lemmon, Tony Curtis and Marylin Monore for this Billy Wilder-directed laugh riot. Warning: your sides may split.

Palm Beach Story (1942). Ignore the confusing ending and beginning. You won't be confused about how funny this film is.

Gold Diggers of 1933 (1933). Ignore the film's social themes and revel in the great Busby Berkeley dance numbers. You get to ogle Joan Blondell and laugh along with Guy Kibbee and Aline MacMahon, too.

Top Hat (1935). Ignore the weak story line. You get to enjoy Fred and Ginger, Hollywood's greatest dance team. Indeed just about any of their films together will have your toes tapping.

The Killing Fields (1984). Ignore...wait, this might not be such a good idea. Skip it.

Bringing Up Baby (1938). (Pictured above.) Nothing to ignore here. The classic screwball comedy features the irrepressible Cary Grant and Katharine Hepburn, an improbable story line, and a leopard named Baby. The word zany comes to mind.

Animal House (1978). Ignore the scenes of sexploitation and enjoy the original–and still best–frat boy comedy. John Belushi's performance alone is priceless (but the DVD can be bought or rented).

Ninotchka (1939). Ignore the somber look at Soviet Russia and enjoy this classic Lubitsch romantic comedy. The suave Melvyn Douglass and the stunning Gretta Garbo are a toothsome twosome. Garbo talks and laughs and so will you!

Scoop (2006) Ignore the ghosts and enjoy the most recent of Woody Allen's many great comedies. No pretense at social commentary here, just a successful stab at tickling your funny bone.

Bananas (1971). Ignore the depictions of a repressive regime and revolution and enjoy another earlier Allen comedy. This is a comedy with some serious spoofing. Side effects may include uproarious laughter.

Ball of Fire (1941). Ignore the mean old mobsters and enjoy Barbara Stanwyck in one of her most sumptuous roles. Even steady ole Gary Cooper will induce a laugh or six.

Stripes (1981). Ignore the military themes. Enjoy Bill Murray, Harold Ramis, John Candy and Warren Oates in one of the smartest slap stick comedies ever made.

(Should symptoms persist after viewing one or more of these films, see your doctor.)

"Nobody Calls a Firefly an Upstart!"

"You're a brave man. Now go and break through enemy lines. And remember when you're risking life and limb through shock and shell we'll be thinking what a sucker you are." It sounds like it might have been said by President GW Bush to any of our soldiers in Iraq. But it is actually a line from The Marx Brothers greatest film, Duck Soup (1933). Which is also, by the way, the greatest of all film comedies.

Many also consider Duck Soup the classic folly-of-war comedy. But according to Groucho Marx, "we were jut four Jews trying to get a laugh." And get a laugh they did. Lots of them. For example: Ambassador Trentino:" I am willing to do anything to prevent this war." Rufus T. Firefly: "It's too late. I've already paid a month's rent on the battlefield."

And: Rufus T. Firefly: "I'll see my lawyer about this as soon as he graduates from law school."

And another line that could have been spoken by the current U.S. president: Rufus T. Firefly: [singing]" If any form of pleasure is exhibited, report to me and it will be prohibited! I'll put my foot down, so shall it be... this is the land of the free! The last man nearly ruined this place he didn't know what to do with it. If you think this country's bad off now, just wait till I get through with it!"

One more: Rufus T. Firefly: Maybe you can suggest something. As a matter of fact, you do suggest something. To me you suggest a baboon. Ambassador Trentino: What?
Rufus T. Firefly: I, uh, I'm sorry I said that; it isn't fair to the rest of the baboons.

And I haven't even gotten to any of Groucho's byplay with Margaret Dumont which includes some of the film's best lines.

So maybe Duck Soup wasn't meant to be a spoof on the politics of war, but as a happy accident it serves that purpose rather nicely. How easily our leaders will plunge a country into war headless of the loss of young lives and the cost to their countries well being. Duck Soup in some respects recalls the origins of World War I. The actual story of how the Great War began sounds like the stuff of comedy. Of course the loss of millions of human beings and other incalculable attendant costs is nothing to yuk yuk about. But playing the politicos' actions for laughs is fair game. Duck Soup does this masterfully.

The story of Duck Soup concerns the fictional country of Fredonia which...really?...seriously? I'm going to give a plot synopsis for Duck Soup? Yeah I don't think so. First of all you've probably seen it and if you're the slightest bit like me (God help you) you've seen many times. If you've never seen it I envy you because you'll enjoy the hilarious mirror scene so much more than us veteran viewers.

Duck Soup is the brothers at their best for three primary reasons. 1) it's got the best lines (see above). 2) It's their most visualizing appealing film. Not just with sight gags but elaborate costumes and sets. 3) It's not bogged down by any sappy love story or non-comic musical numbers. It's wall-to-wall laughs.

Starting with A Night At The Opera (1935) the rest of the Brothers' films would occasionally grind to a halt for romance or a musical interlude.

Hats posthumously off to Duck Soup's director Leo McCarey and the writing team led by Harry Ruby and Bert Kalmar.
But of course when it's a Marx Brothers movie the raves go to Groucho, Harpo, Chico and to a much much lesser extent, Zeppo, who made his last appearance in Duck Soup. And he went out in a classic.